From the category archives:

Choose Your Own Adventure

CYOA: Congratulations, you have died

April 27, 2010
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Well, that’s usually how my Choose Your Own Adventure books ended. Sometimes I died on Mars. And sometimes I died in the Wild West. But I always ended up dead. Let’s see if you suffer the same fate. Where we left off, Heather was fighting with Grinnauld, Neil was fighting off a pack of Guardians, [...]

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CYOA: to pray that yr inner slayer actually exists, turn to page 289

April 19, 2010
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So, let me get this straight. You’ve just walked into Heather’s mansion, where you KNOW the Ancient One is waiting for you, and not only is he totally punctual, he’s also holding Kayleigh as his prisoner. You’ve recently been informed that *apparently* you’re the only one who can kill the Big Bad, and for a [...]

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CYOA: If you don’t know who to trust, turn to page 46.

April 12, 2010
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Okay, I don’t know about you, but after last week’s chapter, I could use another snack, AND nap!  We last left you in a doorway.  Kayleigh is trying to save you, heavy footsteps are behind, and the Silver Fox is beckoning you forward.  But congratulations! You all worked together to vote unanimously for: B) run [...]

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CYOA: to get the hell outta here, turn to page 336

April 5, 2010
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Y’ALL. can i say i’m so glad we’ve put the hard core tough girl act behind us? cos i was getting just a little bit afraid we were getting in WAY over our heads. um, not that we’re coasting along here, but it’s nice to have a little help (and a nap and a snack!). [...]

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CYOA: To go on a road trip, turn to page 157…

March 30, 2010
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Holy Cow! You put your big girl pants on, and with a little help from that potion you drank, things have just gotten more and more exciting around here! Now that you plan to trick Heather into feeding herself to the Royal Ancient Dude, you just have to wait for tomorrow night’s big party.  Thanks [...]

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CYOA: to complete yr degree in mastermindology, turn to page 217.

March 22, 2010
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well, well, you’ve become QUITE the mastermind, stratego pants! neil just ran after heather, jacob probably broke finn’s nose (karma karma karma… sing it with me), and you’ve suddenly come up with a plan to replace kayleigh in the ancient one’s blood supply chain with… A) “Heather.” i’d suggest that you reach for a red [...]

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CYOA: To blow up this joint, turn to page 301.

March 16, 2010
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During our last installment, shit hitteth the fan.  Eth. Frankly, I’m a little super-scared of all of you.  You pretty much unilateraly chose Option D: grab Jacob’s arm and the stake from your back pocket and get ready to fight? That potion was more potent that you thought. One time, when I was about 13, [...]

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CYOA: for a dose of reality, turn to page 206

March 8, 2010
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HOLY SHIZZ, Y’ALL! JACOB KISSED US!!!!! um, and there’s a scary something out there that just broke in upstairs! and is CALLING OUR NAME! while we’ve been pretty badass lately, it’s time to dial back on the buffy juice and get real. by running away! you unanimously chose A) Snap out of it, and say, [...]

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CYOA: To take the red pill, turn to page 46…

March 1, 2010
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Well, the shizz has really hit the fan now, and you’ve surprised us all, as well as yourself, with your cunning and bravery in these last few chapters.  I think somebody’s been taking lessons in badassery from Katniss! So, what’s going to happen to Kayleigh?  Will you ever get a straight answer from Neil?  Could [...]

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CYOA: cue the dramatic music and turn to page 82…

February 22, 2010
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what’s up, you big badass, you?!! i have to say, i’m impressed. in less than 24 hours, you’ve gone from just another geek pining after finn to a buffy-tastic hoss who just hit mr. popular in the stomach with a TREE BRANCH. go on with yr bad self!!!! but now the shizz has REALLY hit [...]

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