Praise the Lord and pass the Salvatores, readers, for tonight, TVD is BACK!!!!!
To commemorate this momentous occasion, George suggested we make a ‘Salvatore Brothers Sandwich’, because, and I quote, “everyone wants to be in one of those!” We whipped them up, and have posted the recipe for you all below!
Now, I don’t know about y’all, but George and I have been long looking forward to tonight. In fact, a couple of weeks ago, for the first time since moving here, we ventured out to a mall here in Austin, and at the mall was a Hot Topic store. George suggested we go in. I asked him if he was serious. He was. BUT! You guys! It was so worth it! Because inside, we found a Stefan tee-shirt! And George agreed to try it on! And he waited in line for 15 minutes to do it!
See! Men out there, do not be ashamed of your love for The Vampire Diaries! Let’s hope this episode was worth the torturous wait! Happy Drinking!
The Salvatore Brothers Sandwich
- Slices of a nice rustic bread (we used a Parisienne sourdough)
- Cheddar Cheese
- Roasted Garlic
- Fresh tomato
- Grill one side of the bread, then, turn it over, spreading the roasted garlic onto the just-grilled side.
- Add slices of cheddar cheese and tomato. Grill like you do.
- Put the pieces together and enjoy the yummy Salvatore goodness!
And now, the recap!
Wolf-girl wakes up naked in the woods (Jenny: this sounds like the start to a very bad joke.) and she has fruit-punch mouth. She’s eaten a bunch of campers! So she drags their bodies into a big pile to burn.
Jenny: Yeah, because THAT’S not suspicious at all. People die by fire out camping all the time.
George: Uh-oh, another S’mores party gone bad in Mystic Falls.
A Mystic Falls deputy shows up, and she pretends she was the only camper left alive. Then she kills him, too!
Elena shows up at the Salvatore mansion, looking for Stefan. And he’s right behind her! AND HE’S SHIRTLESS, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!!!!!! Drink! And they make out a little. Drink! Stefan is cute and jokey, so Drink! and he tells Elena that he wants to go after Isobel while Elena is mixing up a Vervain cocktail. Then Stefan drinks it! And it burns! But it’s okay! He’s going to try to build up a tolerance to iocane powder, too, just like Katherine!
Downstairs, Rose is being all mopey and talking about how she’s okay with dying, and Damon is pretending not to care, and being awesome. Drink! He gives her blood to help her feel better about the fact that she’s dying of a werewolf bite, but it’s not working. Damon tells Elena he has to go, and asks Elena to watch after Rose while he’s gone.
At school, (which Elena doesn’t attend anymore?) Caroline is telling Tyler he did an awesome job of being a werewolf, and he thanks her for helping him. She tells him that they have to reinforce the walls of the campout cave, because if he ever bites her, she’ll die. He wonders, since she’s the only vampire in town, how she knows this. Then Matt shows up! Yay! And he stumbles over some words and mumbles and then KISSES HER!!!!!! Drink! Then Caroline runs away.
Wolf-girl shows up at the Bronze and Alaric calls Damon to tell him she’s been sited. Stefan shows up and asks Alaric if he knows how to get in touch with Isobel, and Alaric says he may have an old number.
Wah, wah, rawr, Rose is sick and sad and dying, and Elena helps her into Damon’s room. Rose asks her if she’s ever been in Damon’s room. She hasn’t.
George: (as Elena) hmmm, he has the better bathroom…
And then she goes all Julie Christie, and starts blaming Elena, whom she thinks is Katherine, so she attacks her!
George: and you thought taking care of your grandmother with dementia was bad…
And oh, she’s back to being okay. Then Rose describes her home south of London, where she did NOT get her accent. She says some other stuff that I won’t bore you with, the gist being that Elena shouldn’t give up her life. Hey, Stefan has an iPhone! Stefan leaves a message for Isobel, and Damon shows once again how much he cares by asking the wolf-lady if there’s a cure for werewolf-vampire bites. She’s turns out to be NOT helpful. Or is she?
George: I think the cure might actually be for the vampire to bite the werewolf. A little hair of the dog, heh…
Back at the Salvatore mansion, Rose is out of bed again, and creepy-creepy moments of Elena looking for her later, it turns out Rose has found the freezer-chest full of blood cupcakes! Party on the cellar floor!
George: Easy on those blood capri-suns Rose, or you’ll make yourself sick!
But now Rose thinks Elena is Katherine again, and makes very suspenseful chase around the mansion.Holy crap! Elena burns her with sunlight and then digs her fingers into Rose’s festering wound to make her escape, but runs upstairs and shuts herself into a room, and sees…? (Commercial break!)
Jenny: A motorcycle helmet?
George: Is somebody in the closet? (Closet… closet…)
Oh, it’s just that the motorcycle helmet is hanging near the door that Rose is trying to break down with violence and some ‘it’s okay, honey’ action.
At the school, Matt asks Caroline why she ran away after he kissed her, and she tells him she loves him, but then runs away again.
Stake in hand, Elena decides that the best defense is an offense, and goes on the hunt for Rose. Creepy stuff happens and Damon appears! But Rose has snuck out to the school! And she’s puking near the garbage cans.
George: It’s another town celebration! And somebody always dies at one! Why do they keep having them?!!!
Jenny: Aw, poor maintenance man.
The po-po have showed up at the garbage cans, and Damon lends his support to Mommy Sheriff.
Jenny: Aw, Elena, YOU’RE Damon’s top priority!
A pretty young couple go to get in their car, and Rose eats them.
George: The anonymous couple walking alone with a vampire on the loose is the Vampire Diaries equivalent of the red shirt guy on Star Trek.
Then Damon and Elena show up and Damon is awesome Drink! and sweet and talks her down from the binging. Rose has a sad Drink! because she didn’t mean to be a glutton. We feel kind of bad for her, because she’s dying. Then they take her back to the Salvatore’s and Damon plays nursemaid and is awesome Drink! and Rose tells Elena again that she needs to fight and not give up. Damon’s facial expressions are awesome. Drink!
Jenny: Pretty funny, Rose, since running away is your M.O.
Tyler is sitting alone on the porch when Caroline comes home. He asks her why she would risk being killed by him. She tells him that she cares, and then he kisses her.
George: Who-oah!
Jenny: My heart is sort of breaking right now, yet simultaneously I find this kind of hot.
Then Caroline is awesome, saying that everybody needs to stop kissing her! Drink!
Jenny: I wish that was my problem.
George: If I had a dime for every time I’ve had to say that, Caroline…
Jenny: Hey!
Damon is still at Rose’s sickbed, and is awesome. Drink! Then, flashback! Drink! Rose is, I suppose on the English countryside– although it looks kind of like Virginia.
George: Wow, Rose, I didn’t know you grew up in The Princess Bride.
Then Damon appears!
Jenny: Whoah! IS this a flashback? Is Damon using some mind-meld thing to make her dream?
George: Vampire Inception!
Jenny: Where’s my Joseph Gordon-Levitt?
Oh man! Then Damon stakes her! And he’s crying! Oh, Damon!
Mommy Sheriff drives out into the woods and meets Damon. He shows her Rose’s body and she thanks him for keeping the town of Mystic Falls safe. Tyler meets the wolf-girl at the Bronze, and she tells him that Caroline killed Uncle Benicio! And lied to him about there being more vampires in Mystic Falls!
Jenny: Uh-oh, werewolf army on the way…
George: There’s going to be a vampire/werewolf showdown…
Damon comes home, and Elena is waiting for him. She knows he’s upset, and tries to get him to share his feelings.
George: Crazy eyes!
So he does! And it’s really sad. Then he tells her to go home, and she says she will, but then she hugs him! For a really long time! Drink! And he almost cries. Elena goes home, and Stefan is there! She asks him if he found Isobel. He says ‘not exactly’… and OMG!!!!! It’s Uncle-Daddy Sark!!!!!
Jenny: This is the best thing to happen since Stefan’s shirtlessness!!!!!
George: Yeah! Sark-attack!
Then a girl is driving down the road, and there’s a guy lying in the middle of it. And it’s Damon! And he’s really having a bad day, what with all of his feelings.
And he tells her all he’s got is trouble, and he has a secret, and that he can’t be what she (Jenny: Elena? Katherine?) wants him to be, and then he tells her what his secret is! It’s that he misses being a human! SO. MUCH! He is really, really awesome. Drink! And then he eats her.
George: Aahhhh!
Next week: More Sark! But bad things appear to be happening to Caroline! So, what do you think? I have to say, the shirtlessness and return of Daddy Sark make us feel it was worth the wait! Are you sad to see Rose go? Will Damon try to be totally evil again, to combat the good inside?
