nikki howard: brain trust

book report for Runaway by meg cabot, the final book of the Airhead series

bff charm: yay
swoonworthy scale: 10
talky talk: right on
bonus factors: Iron Man 2; Ocean’s 11
relationship status: my favorite celebutante

the deal:

Where we last left off, Em Watts had discovered that her brain had been transplanted into supermodel Nikki Howard’s body, after a “freak” “accident” at the Stark Megastore grand opening.  Em, now stuck in Nikki’s body, has had to get used to a lot of things, like the fact that her “boyfriend” Brandon Stark is a jerk whose dad is tracking Em’s every move, her roommate, Lulu, is constantly getting into scraps, her best friend/love of her life, Christopher, doesn’t know she’s alive (literally!) and, yeah, the tiny little minor inconvenience of BEING STUCK IN SOMEONE ELSE’S BODY.

The action really ramped up in the second Airhead book, Being Nikki, in which Christopher finally found out that Em was alive, Frida became far less slappable, Em met Nikki’s brother and mother, Brandon went totes Crazy McGee on everyone and Em came face to face with, well, Nikki.

So what happens after Nikki lets everyone know her secret?  And then Brandon totally kidnaps Em, Nikki and Nikki’s family in a plot to usurp his father?  Why did Stark Megastores spend so much money keeping Nikki Howard’s body alive?  (Especially since Nikki’s pretty convinced they actually wanted her dead.)  Will Brandon ever get less-douchey?  Will Nikki hate Em forever?  Can evil Stark Megastores be brought down?  And will Christopher get naked?!?!?!  (The answer to that last question is YES!  In my dreams, almost nightly, anyway.)

bff charm:  yay!

Of course Em still has my BFF charm!!  She’s just as smart and vulnerable and sarcastic and awesome as she is in the last two books!  Plus, her “Plan C” (you’ll find out when you read it) is THE MOST AWESOME DISTRACTION TOOL EVS.

But I’d like to extend my BFF charm to Lulu as well, because, well . . . I love Lulu.  I want Lulu to be in my life, not just because her father is rich, not just because she knows how to throw kickass parties and give awesome makeovers, but because she’s probably the most endearing, adorable sidekick that the YA world has seen in a while.  Lulu, I want to hug you!

swoonworthy scale:  10!

LORD, Meg Cabot!!  What are you doing to me, woman?  I am glad I have what my doctor calls “a worringly low blood pressure, almost as if you were dead” because otherwise I WOULD HAVE A HEART ATTACK FROM SWOONING.

I mean, I’m just sayin’.  The dream-that-isn’t.  Hoo boy.  Christopher, call me.

talky talk: right on

Meg Cabot continues in her awesome, breezy, pop-culturey style in this book.  And while I know that some people aren’t fond of pop-culture references, feeling they date a book, I’ve decided that Meg Cabot is actually doing future generations a solid.  Cause what if, in 20 years, people don’t understand that Ed Hardy is Lord of the Douchebags?  What if somehow that guy that runs Ed Hardy (Ed Hardy isn’t even his real name!) somehow publicly reforms himself and starts offering well-constructed clothing in neutral or otherwise pleasant tones?  With nary a “tiger tattoo design” in sight?  People must be reminded of the horror he has inflicted on this generation!!!  And with Meg Cabot’s works, they will be.

bonus factor: Iron Man

Actually at no point is Iron Man even mentioned.  HOWEVER, I like to believe that the Stark family from the Airhead series are related to Tony Stark, and at some point Tony Stark will fly in to deliver some whoop-ass on his fictional brother Richard, and then consume his entire collection of scotch.

Okay, okay, and because it’s IRON MAN 2 DAY!!

bonus factor: Ocean’s 11

No, there’s no breaking into casinos.  But Runaway just proves that with a good group of friends with varied talents, you can get anything accomplished.

casting call:

So, Meghan has already cast some of the characters in her most excellent review of the first two books in this series, but I’m going to attempt to cast some of the others:

Did you guys know that 10 Things I Hate About You has been cancelled?  While obviously this frees up Ethan to be in FYA’s production of Gale Naked In The Woods, the little-known addendum book to The Hunger Games trilogy, it is SADMAKING because how else are we going to get to see (and more importantly HEAR) Ethan Peck every week??  So we’re just going to have to cast him in everything we possibly can from here on out.  (I wonder if Ethan Peck trying to put on a British accent would negatively affect his voice.  Hmm.  This casting call may need to be revised later.)

 

Since he doesn’t have anything to do either, why not?  Plus he’s so good in the “Meaty and Stupid” role.

 

She’s pretty-in-a-normal-way, and lord knows she has practice being emo and glum, so I think she’s a good choice to play Nikki Howard.  Cause you guys?  Nikki Howard is totally alive.

relationship status: my favorite celebutante

Guys, I can’t wait to become Celeb BFFs with this book!!  We’re going to hit all the hot spots, and have our photograph taken by paps, and weigh in on Heidi’s Unfortunate Plastic Surgery and Kristen’s Total Cocaine Face.  After chilling in Rio for a few months, we’ll totally take jobs as interns in Kelly Cutrone’s Fashion PR firm, and when we have to cry, we’ll go outside.  (While we’re there, we will talk Stephanie Skinner into a makeover.  And maybe also a long nap.)

Every Saturday will be spent at the Christian Louboutin sample sale, and we’ll talk about our weighty life problems over six-inch stilettos, then hit up Shake Shack for lunch, and then give those interviews to US Weekly that I hate where we’re all, “I don’t know why I’m gorgeous and a size 2!  I eat whatever I want and never exercise!  It must just be genes, I guess,” while flipping our Ken Paves’ extention-ed hair.

Which, let’s face it, will be just about the best friendship ever.

Related posts:

1. CYOA: If you don’t know who to trust, turn to page 46.
2. the airhead series

Tagged as: evil corporations, models