REPORT CARD for the Mortal Instruments Series by Cassandra Clare
bff charm: yay!
swoonworthy scale: 7
talky talk: Easy Peasy with a side of too cool for school
bonus factor: duckie, mysterious loner dude, bonus jonas
relationship status: summer fling
the deal:
Clary Fray, your average bohemian NYC teenager, witnesses what she at first thinks to be a murder in a goth club that plunges her into a new reality: Demons are real. And so are Shadowhunters, humans with the blood of angels, whose sole purpose in life is to hunt demons, and keep downworlders- vampires, werewolves, faeries and warlocks for those of us in the ‘mundane’ world- in line. After surviving a demon attack herself, and discovering that her mother has mysteriously disappeared, Clary, with her best friend Simon in tow, is forced into the Shadowhunter’s ( Jace, Alec, and Isabelle) protection. But why does she suddenly have ‘the sight’, and how could her human body handle the rune magic the Shadowhunters use for healing and protection? And who has been messing with her memories? Oh, and while she’s trying to unravel the mystery that has become her life, Clary has to try to save her mother, help her new friends stop the cataclysmic plans of the evil Valentine, AND deal with an awesomely tortured romance.
bff charm: YAY!
Clary is not necessarily a girl’s girl, but she also isn’t one of those girls who’s only friends with boys to get all the attention. She’s self-contained, and a deep thinker, without being a drama queen. And when drama comes her way, and BOY does it, she actually tries to deal with it, and make good decisions, instead of just wallowing in self-pity. She’s proactive, but doesn’t put herself in TOO many damselish situations. There was a TEENSY bit of a placeholderishness to the way she was written, but instead of taking up that spot in my mind, it made we want to get to know her more.
swoonworthy scale: 7
The chemistry between Clary and Jace, the mysterious loner dude/shadowhunter starts strong in the first book, and builds to squee worthy proportions that manage to stay at squee intensity throughout the series. Through crazy circumstances, these two actually, tenderly love each other in a way that surpassed the typical OMG first crush.
talky talk: Easy Peasy with a side of too cool for school
Cassandra Clare writes in a way that’s compelling enough to devour pages- one of my favorite attributes in any author- and even though these books won’t change your life or the way you think or anything, they are just thoroughly enjoyable. There is a bit of too cool for school insider-type jokes, some that I got, and some that I didn’t- anime anyone?
But what I have to give her major props for is this: Ok, slight SPOILER, here, so skip to the next part, and don’t read the back cover of the books if you don’t want to know this!
She manages to keep something that should be totally ooky and gross- um, our two lovebirds might be related, what?- not ooky at all. Here’s me reading: oh, I think they’re gonna be related…no! they can’t be…I don’t care if they are, kiss, dammit!
And I seriously don’t go in for that kind of thing. Just saying.
bonus factor: duckie
Simon is the classic duckie, from being secretly in love with his best friend, down to the annoying bits- see too cool for school above, they mostly refer to him- the dorky/but actually cool artsy/nerd who’s actually way hotter than he realizes (but of course) but who only has eyes for Clary. But I had to cut him some slack, because he also went through some real crap in these books, and he, too, tries to make the right decisions and be a good friend.
bonus factor: mysterious loner dude
I fell in love with Jace, the demon slaying shadowhunter who falls for Clary, about a quarter way through the first book, and couldn’t get enough of him after that. Why was he not on every page??? Like any good mysterious loner dude, he had a rough life up until we met him, but unlike a LOT of loner dudes, he actually had a lot going on inside, and wasn’t hesitant to let Clary in. Jace is full of pain and self-hatred, for reasons I won’t spoil for you, but in Clary, he finds a purpose, and once the major relationship shizz hit the fan (see, or don’t see spoiler above) he didn’t totally emo out. I know I keep saying this for everybody, but one thing I liked about these characters was how they all took an active part in trying to do the right thing, even if by sometimes misguided attempts.
bonus factor: bonus jonas
Magnus Bane, kick-ass gay warlock, extraordinaire. That kind of sums it up, but I loved this character so much, I would be remiss not to give him his own mention.
casting call:
mia wasikowska as clary
This girl is just so darn cute! She is the only person I could see getting the quiet diferentness of Clary.
robert pattinson as jace
okay, OKAY, I know, but hear me out. This was one I didn’t have to think about. I pictured him as Jace, while I was reading it, and no, not because I’m crushing- along with most every other person with a pulse- but because it seemed as if Cassandra Clare was actually describing my man diggory on the pages. So blame her…although I don’t think even a formal request from the Queen Mum herself could get the man to sign on for another YA series.
nicholas d'agosto as simon
Yes, Simon is way cuter than he realizes.
megan fox as isabelle
If somebody could only send this girl to charm school, she could take over the world.
ian somerhalder as alec
Mostly because I think he looks like he could be Megan Fox’s brother.
ewan mcgregor as magnus bane
I know, you might think he’s too old, but read the series, and you’ll get it. Besides, nobody, NOBODY can pull off wearing eyeliner like Mr. McGregor.
sam trammell as luke
I know I didn’t mention the character of Luke, but I loved him. Loved him. And when you read the book, you might say, ahhh… I didn’t mean to typecast, but I couldn’t help it.
julian sands as valentine
Poor Julian Sands. We’ll always have A Room With A View
relationship status: summer fling
While I was reading these books, I couldn’t put them down, and when I was done, I felt satisfied, but didn’t pine for more. Reading them won’t change your life, but they are totally worth the time it takes to finish them. Even if you aren’t generally a fan of the fantasy genre, the story is more about relationships and finding yourself. I had a thoroughly enjoyable tryst, and am ready to move on.
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i COMPLETELY and WHOLEHEARTEDLY agree with this review, jenny. i felt the same way about the books– they were super fun to read (*quite* devourable) but, like the empty calories of a delicious cupcake, they didn’t stay with me.
i loved the storyline and the mythology created by clare, but the dialogue seriously started to annoy me by the third (ok, second… OK first!) book. there were many scenes where all of the characters basically sounded the same, and the fact that clare actually induced me to care about them made the lazy dialogue even more frustrating.
with that said, jace = THE HOTNESS. GOOD LORD. that scene in the greenhouse? UM I’M SORRY IS IT GETTING HOT IN HERE?! and although i’m obvs not a twilight fan, i completely agree with you on the pattison casting. i’m actually pretty sure that clare *was* describing pattison when she wrote this book.
good call on valentine too, btw!
i actually think these books would make *fantastic* movies (and a good screenwriter could definitely improve the dialogue), so we’ll see if hollywood takes the bait!
I think that Twilight has started to ruin any genre YA fiction for me. Damn it, sparkly vampires, I *like* cheesy fantasy YA!
HOWEVER. If Ewan could sign on to be Magnus Bane, I would buy the dvd of the film and keep it with me at all times.
I’m totally interested in this series now! I love supernatural dramas and the whole concept of shadowhunters is super kick-ass: blood of angels? Awesome. I’m going to be taking a 2 week vacation (okay, honeymoon! But I’ll still spend most of my time reading, because that’s how I do) and I may bring these books (along with a million others) to pass the time!
Yay, Meredith! Read on! The swoonworthy factor makes these books an excellent choice for a honeymoon read!
totally spot-on review! at first, i was all “aw hell naw” about reading this series, because of the huge endorsement by stephanie meyer plastered on the cover. however, my friend convinced me to read it and i’m glad i did. something i really appreciate you pointing out is the fact that the characters try really hard to react to situations in the best ways possible. i hate comparing this to twilight, but i guess i’ve already gone there: clary blows bella out of the water by simply being active in the world going on around her. she’s definitely no doormat.
i totally agree with you and poshdeluxe on the dialogue. that was probably my biggest gripe about the books. i felt like i was reading the script for juno, minus teen pregnancy plus demon huntin’ activities. after awhile, though, the narrative took over and i didn’t mind the dialogue as much, and it seemed as though the super clever quips generally took a backseat when it came time for the characters to show genuine emotion.
and spoiler alert, i was also amazed at how little i cared about the plot twist being creepy. i did end up googling what the outcome was before i came to the answer in the books, but even before that i totally found myself rooting the characters on, hoping that it would somehow work out for them. i don’t know how clare was able to convince us, but it totally worked.
Nicky, thank you! I agree with you whole heartedly about Clary!
And I can’t wait until you read Hunger Games!
Just finished reading City of Bones and wondering if I should continue the series. There was a lot to like about the series – the mythology’s cool, as are the characters – but I felt like the pacing was off or something. There was always crazy shit happening, true, but because Clary wasn’t up to speed on the world of demons it felt like the plot twists were sometimes almost meaningless because they required so much exposition, which slowed everything down. That said, she’s well adjusted to the Shadowhunters now so maybe the subsequent books have more flow?
There’s something imperfect about Clare’s writing, but I did feel that the series was worth finishing.
I read the series at the suggestion of a teen, and I think you were pretty spot on in your review. It was interesting, I read it quickly, but unlike everyone else, I really couldn’t get over the creepy romance plotline. It did actually ick me out, BIG TIME. I knew it had to be resolved, but still. GROSS. And yea, the writing could use some (or a lot of) work. She’s better than Meyer, but really, who isn’t? Overall, I was kind of “meh” at the end. But PoshDeluxe, I think you’re right in that it would make an EXCELLENT movie, and Jenny, they should totally get you to cast it. Luke (my fav character, along with Magnus, and done by Ewan McGregor OMFG) totally looked like Sam in my head. Or Professor Lupin.
I just read City of Bones and nearly finished City of Ashes yesterday, and I love this series! I know I’m late to the party, but I am wary of fantasy novels. This doesn’t feel like reading fantasy, thought, and the books made a 9-hour day of traveling seem short. Your casting call is spot on, too!!
Thanks Allison! I wish the people in charge of the movie had listened to me!
Gaah, don’t ruin book no 4 for me! I totally didn’t see Robert Pattison in front of me! Well, until now (think other thoughts, think other thoughts)!
I’ll be reviewing book 4 in a couple of weeks!
I refuse to read her books as she is a flaming plagiarist and even takes chunks of dialogue out of her fanfic for her book. She is also a horrible person who used her bnf status to actively hurt others.